Pushing Ahead Through Fear

Devotional Reflection, Wednesday, April 16, 2025

Wednesday in Holy Week

David W. Perkins, Th.D.

Key phrases for reflection from today’s reading in John’s Gospel

27 ‘Now my soul is troubled. And what should I say—“Father, save me from this hour”? No, it is for this reason that I have come to this hour. 28Father, glorify your name.’ Then a voice came from heaven, ‘I have glorified it, and I will glorify it again.’

You will find the full text of today’s Gospel reading at the end of this reflection.

Daily Office Lectionary Readings (BCP, 956)

AM Psalm 55; PM Psalm 74

Jer. 17:5-10, 14-17; Phil. 4:1-13; John 12:27-36

David's Reflections

Yesterday, we observed that Jesus was distressed about the possibility of rejection and death.  In verse 27 of today's Gospel, he says, "Now is my soul troubled."  This saying and the next, "And what should I say--'Father save me from this hour'"?, echo the prayer the other three Gospels report that Jesus uttered in Gethsemane the night he was arrest, "Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me."  John does not contain the Gethsemane prayer scene.

In John 14:1, Jesus tells us, "Let not your hearts be troubled."  The word translated "troubled" there is the same word translated "troubled" here.  The one who told us not to let our hearts be troubled could say that his soul was troubled.

That same Jesus lives within us.  If he has experienced fear and anxiety, then he can and will live into ours, share it with us, and bear it with us.  His experience teaches us that we cannot expect to live free from anxiety or free from fear.  He did not.  But, we can expect of ourselves that we will not be ruled by our fears and anxieties.  Those feelings can be raw, powerful, and paralyzing.  It takes emotional courage to keep going in the face of them.  Jesus had that courage, and he can embolden us to push through our fears and persist in our commitment.

If we have this courage, will the fear and anxiety disappear?  No!  Courage does not mean the absence of fear or anxiety.  Rather, it means the ability to act consistently with our values in the face of overpowering emotions to the contrary.  Jesus found courage in God’s voice in our text to move ahead through his fear and anxiety toward rejection, unbearable suffering, abandonment by his closest friends, and death.  He found courage in the center of his being where God dwelt.

What refreshing candor we see here in Jesus. He normalizes fear with his prayer He models for us a way forward—be honest with God about how our hearts are fainting and count on Christ’s keeping company with us, experiencing our feelings, and fortifying our hearts. With Jesus we can push through our fears into a larger, freer space.

In his remarkable book, The Courage to Create, Rollo May said:

 . .. courage will not be the opposite of despair.  We shall often be faced with despair, as indeed every sensitive person has been during the last several decades in this country. . . . courage is not the absence of despair;  it is, rather, the capacity to move ahead in spite of despair.

    A chief characteristic of this courage is that it requires a centeredness within our own being, without which we would feel ourselves to be a vacuum.  The 'emptiness' within corresponds to an apathy without;  and apathy adds up,   in the long run,  to cowardice.  That is why we must always base our commitment in the center of our own being, or else no commitment will be ultimately authentic+

+Rollo May, The Courage to Create (New York:  W. W. Norton, 1975), pp. 12-13.

Collect of the Day:  Sunday of the Passion: Palm Sunday

Almighty and everliving God, in your tender love for the human race you sent your Son our Savior Jesus Christ to take upon him our nature, and to suffer death upon the cross, giving us the example of his great humility: Mercifully grant that we may walk in the way of his suffering, and also share in his resurrection; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen.  (BCP, 219)

Collect for Wednesday in Holy Week

Lord God, whose blessed Son our Savior gave his body to be whipped and his face to be spit upon: Give us grace to accept joyfully the sufferings of the present time, confident of the glory that shall be revealed; through Jesus Christ your Son our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen.  (BCP, 220)

A Collect for Grace

Lord God, almighty and everlasting Father, you have brought us in safety to this new day: Preserve us with your mighty power, that we may not fall into sin, nor be overcome by adversity; and in all we do, direct us to the fulfilling of your purpose; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen. (BCP, 100)

For the Diocese

O God, by your grace you have called us in this Diocese to a goodly fellowship of faith. Bless our Bishop (name), other clergy (names), and all our people. Grant that your Word may be truly preached and truly heard, your Sacraments faithfully administered and faithfully received. By your Spirit, fashion our lives according to the example of your Son, and grant that we may show the power of your love to all among whom we live; through Jesus Christ our Lord.  Amen.  (BCP, 817)

A Prayer for Light

O Lord God Almighty, as you have taught us to call the evening, the morning, and the noonday one day; and have made the sun to know its going down: Dispel the darkness of our hearts, that by your brightness we may know you to be the true God and eternal light, living and reigning for ever and ever. Amen.  (BCP, 110)

A Collect for Mission

Lord Jesus Christ, you stretched out your arms of love on the hard wood of the cross that everyone might come within the reach of your saving embrace: So clothe us in your Spirit that we, reaching forth our hands in love, may bring those who do not know you to the knowledge and love of you; for the honor of your Name. Amen. (BCP, 101)

Daily Office Gospel, John 12:27-36

27 ‘Now my soul is troubled. And what should I say—“Father, save me from this hour”? No, it is for this reason that I have come to this hour. 28Father, glorify your name.’ Then a voice came from heaven, ‘I have glorified it, and I will glorify it again.’ 29The crowd standing there heard it and said that it was thunder. Others said, ‘An angel has spoken to him.’ 30Jesus answered, ‘This voice has come for your sake, not for mine. 31Now is the judgment of this world; now the ruler of this world will be driven out. 32And I, when I am lifted up from the earth, will draw all people to myself.’ 33He said this to indicate the kind of death he was to die. 34The crowd answered him, ‘We have heard from the law that the Messiah remains forever. How can you say that the Son of Man must be lifted up? Who is this Son of Man?’ 35Jesus said to them, ‘The light is with you for a little longer. Walk while you have the light, so that the darkness may not overtake you. If you walk in the darkness, you do not know where you are going. 36While you have the light, believe in the light, so that you may become children of light.’ After Jesus had said this, he departed and hid from them.

Daily Prayer Offices in The Book of Common Prayer

Morning Prayer, Rite 2, page 75, Book of Common Prayer

Noonday Prayer, p. 103, Book of Common Prayer

Order of Worship for Evening (Vespers), p. 109, Book of Common Prayer

Evening Prayer, Rite 2, page 115, Book of Common Prayer

Compline (Night Prayer), Page 127, Book of Common Prayer

Daily Devotionals, page 136, Book of Common Prayer